I want the right to make the choice! Does that make me part of the pro-choice movement and a liberal?

Turning Pro-Choice

We have chosen to turn to our family and friends when we have gotten in tight financial situations. We have chosen not to apply for food stamps, WIC or other government subsidies (although we have applied for the EIC in the past just for full disclosure).

We have chosen to go without whenever possible in order to make the budget balance – like Christmas, birthdays and even vacations – and made the most of what we already had. We talk to our children about finances and we work together as a family to make the most of all that we have.

We have chosen to purchase HSA insurance because we rarely go to the doctor. I come from a medical family, so we do not see the doctor for colds, upset stomachs or other minor issues.

We have chosen to homeschool our children because we enjoy being together as a family, knowing what our children are studying and working with our children in all that they are striving to achieve.

We have chosen to live in a smaller home with more land because that gives us freedom to do more and also requires a LOT less cleaning (not to mention fewer monthly expenses).

We have chosen to have internet run to our home at our own expense because I needed the higher speeds for my work online. We had to save for a year to afford the expense and until then I used dial-up.

We have chosen to have a large SUV because I feel safer in the bigger vehicle and because there is more room for three growing boys.

Choices are the only constant of life. The government needs to be more concerned with the choices it is making than with the ones that me and my family are making. Maybe then their budget would balance!

What are some of the choices you want to continue to make for yourself or your family?

Top 10 Ways NOT to Encourage Your Husband

1. Keep a list of all of the things he has done wrong and pull it out to use any time he has a complaint about your mother.

2. Take the check from him at the holiday meal and tell the waitress “I am the one who pays the bills.”

3. Point out all of the things he has not done around the house and then proceed to call your friend to come do it for you instead.

4. Turn off the cable to save money just as his favorite sport is tipping off, kicking off or otherwise getting started.

5. Fix breakfast for everyone but him because if he had really wanted breakfast then he would have gotten up and fixed it.

6. Turn off the television in the middle of the big game (or big race) and remind him that he needs to be doing something constructive like picking up the sticks in the yard.

7. Point out an old boyfriend in the annual and ask him why he is not more like that guy.

8. Interrupt his rant about money to tell him that the bills are due, that you spent the last few dollars on that pair of shoes that was on sale BUT the check from the last job will be here any day now.

9. Call him a jerk – or something more colorful – and tell him he is acting just like his father.

10. Tell him he is acting like a baby – particularly when the four hear old can hear and starts chanting “Daddy is a baby; daddy is a baby.”

Valentine’s is not just about hearts and chocolate. It is about lifting up and encouraging the people we love. Keep in mind that every negative word must be countered with at least 20 positive words and actions. It is just a lot easier to start with the positive from the beginning.

If you are unable to say anything nice then say nothing at all.

Anyone struggling with the internet terms of SEO, Twitter, Facebook or other social networks may not be as overwhelmed by that number as I am. The ones that have figured out SEO and search engines and the magic key to pagerank are not overwhelmed because they know how to get there. I hang out here on the edge of the internet lunch room. I want to join the popular crowd but seem to be finding an empty table all my own.

Can you tell I am feeling just a little on the disgusted side?

My issue is simple. Ten days ago a friend mentioned a contest to write a “good mood” blog. I am all about the good, the positive and the uplifting so it seemed like the perfect fit. The first round is all about votes. It is up to each person trying to get the job to get the most votes. You have to be in the top twenty to make it to the next round.

The last several months I have concentrated on my “platform” or the number of people that I am connected with on a regular basis. It felt like a sound platform so I figured that I could jump in this contest with out too much worry about drowning.

The truth is that my votes are no where near the top twenty at this point. I have asked, begged and pleaded with my followers on twitter and facebook and have emailed every person I have ever known.

Finding a Silver Lining

I can only complain for so long before the silver lining reveals itself and I am back to the good, the positive and the uplifting. I would still love to have the job as a “good mood” blogger. The pay would be a blessing and I could use a new computer. BUT the experience that I am having by participating in the competition is something that I would have otherwise never experienced.

1. Never be afraid to ask for the sale. I am the daughter of a salesman and even paid part of my way through college selling knives and dance lessons. Selling is in my blood. I just never thought to sell my writing or my websites. It sounds silly, but for some reason promoting self seems wrong even when it is the self that makes the living. This contest has helped me overcome that fear to some degree.

2. My platform needs more work. I may have a few followers on Twitter and friends on Facebook but the numbers are not where they need to be if I want to be taken seriously by an agent or publisher. I have to dig in and put more effort into building my platform.

3. The results show up where the energy it put. The amount of time and effort that I spent at the beginning of the competition needs to be repeated in the efforts that I am making for building my websites and for expanding my writing and speaking career.

4. What others think can not matter. I was worried about telling others about the competition in the beginning. What if they did not support me? What if they also applied (and one fellow home school mom did just that)? No matter what others say or do I have to follow through on the steps I feel I need to take to expand my purpose and pursue my passion.

In the end every experience can be a beneficial experience. This “good mood” competition has shown me new ways to connect with others through forums, Twitter, Facebook and other social networking sites. I have learned that I have to continue to build my expertise through guest posts and my own content and also my page rank through SEO and links.

More good has come from this experience than bad no matter how many votes I end up with at the end of the month. I know more today than yesterday and that has me one step closer to my future.

I would appreciate your vote if you do not mind (each IP address can vote once a day) and if you could share the link it would help.

One of my first personal experiences happened with a leader of the church. I was attending a Christian writers conference the weekend of one of the church’s special suppers so I had not signed up to bring a dish. He walked over and grabbed my hand. Your commitment to the church is down here and it should be up here – and he raised my hand over my head. It was hard for me not to use my hand to hit him over HIS head. But I maintained my composure. I knew where God was leading me and I was not about to be swayed by the limited vision of man.

I recently had a friend call and tell me that her husband had an opportunity to do something that he was passionate about and gifted in but it would require that they miss church. The event would put them with other Christians and would provide the family with the opportunity to celebrate and grow together. We are free from the rules and the laws for a reason. Rules and laws can and do hinder our purpose.

Sharing encouragement and growing others to pursue their passion to their purpose is something that I have a hunger and desire to do. A recent opportunity required that I miss my own bible study to be able to complete a project for that very purpose. It would be easy to fall into guilt for missing but it is important to focus on the positives of the possibilities.

There are those people that never miss church. They are there any time that the doors are open. My family has fallen into that category on more than one occasion. When those family or friends come to visit that live away, it is time to fellowship at home together instead of insisting that the normal and ordinary routine be followed. Sticking to the ordinary often means missing out on the extraordinary.

The first thought I had is how rules can hinder our walk with God. The truth is that a strict interpretation of tradition can do just as much damage to the pursuit of passion and purpose. We are each called to an individual walk. This does not mean choosing to avoid traditions and rules and regulations for the purpose of doing nothing but it does mean being flexible enough to follow your own path.

Conspiracy #1 – My husband has been on a trip for the last several days and returned with a new attitude. He PROMISED he’d get up early and I almost fell for it. Rearranging my day to NOT expect it set me behind. Getting it all done while he was gone and on time was not a problem because I knew I was the only one to do it. Why do we let the companionship of others throw our plans into such disarray?

Conspiracy #2 – Several deadlines loomed at me yesterday so it was the appropriate time for the neighbor to call to see if my husband could help him. My husband also decided to run errands for me because he knew I needed to work. The kids stayed with me so not much actual work was accomplished. It’s the thought that counts, right?

Conspiracy #3 – The boys went with my husband out on the lake so I took advantage of the quiet to finish up early and go on to bed.

• The phone rang only thirty minutes after I go settled and it was my FIL concerned that the boys weren’t home yet. I spent the next thirty minutes trying to find my crew. It’s so much harder to fall asleep the second time.
• FIL called back around 10 pm because my husband did not stop by and talk to him and did not call him like he said he would. I apologized and tried to stay calm – 3rd attempt at sound sleep.
• That’s about the time the crew chose to come home. The 4th time is just annoying.
• My youngest son starting crying and screaming at 11:30 pm so I had to get up to settle him back into bed. 5h time trying to get some sleep.
• The phone rang at 12:30 am.
• My middles son started coughing around 1am
• The youngest son was up again at 2 am.

I lost count of the number of times that I crawled in and out of bed and fell in and out of sleep but I do know that having my husband sleep soundly next to me was adding to my annoyance level!

I think sleep finally came although I ended up staying in bed WAY longer than I ever do and now I’m having trouble getting the crew started. It’s frustrating when other people don’t do what you expect or even what they say.

Staying Calm in the Storm

1. Take LOTS of deep breaths. It is important to remain calm during the storm.

2. Take baby steps. Completing even small tasks can help get the focus back on the important stuff and away from the conspiracy problems.

3. Take it lightly. Conspiracies may seem real but they are usually figments of our imagination. Enjoy the irony of the situation or at least try to smile. Smiles make everything a little easier to take.

Conspiracies aside, I did manage to get at least one of my projects completed. I’m determined to finish up the rest today and enjoy the long holiday weekend. The schedule is a bit off, but then so am I so I should be use to it. The truth is that I am the only person or thing that I can rely on outside of God and even then I can end up disappointing me.

What are the magic tips that you have for staying calm and focused during a conspiracy?